Sander Roscoe Wolff

When I can, I love taking pictures of my friends and family. This post will be, from now on, where I post nice shots of Lauren. For example:

Lauren, Shari, and I went for a walk this morning along a reclaimed area that runs beneath some power towers. We love the walk, and the City of Lakewood has done a wonderful job of planting lots of native and drought-resistant species. Prompted by Lauren, I paused for a moment to snap a few pictures.

Lauren’s been taking riding lessons, and I go with her and hang out with the horses. One, in particular, is my bestie. His name is Rodeo. I’ve taken a bunch of pictures of him, and here are some:

As I’m sure you know, when a parent saddles a child with an unusual first name, it is considered good form to provide the child with a fall-back middle name, one that, if the first proves to be too problematic, can be used safely and without controversy.

As you now know, my first name is Sander. Although not entirely unknown (younger people tend to associate it with Xander of Buffy fame), it isn’t exactly standard. Also, because it confuses people, I am often called strange variations, like Sanders, Sandler, Sandlers, Saunder, Saunders and, more meliciously, Slander.

So, keeping all that in mind, care to venture another guess for that ‘R’ middle name?

Ok, so I won’t keep you in suspense any longer… The middle name for the Jewish lad from Manhatten is:

ROSCOE!

There were two especially problematic things with Roscoe. First, when I was very little, my mother called me Sander Rascal Wolff. As a result, I adopted my Father’s sister’s married name: Katz.

So, from the ages of about 3-7 I was Sander Katz Wolff. The other problem was The Dukes of Hazzard. That TV show featured a character by the name of Roscoe P Coltrain. The association was inescapable so, even though I recovered from the Rascal issue, my middle name remained a deep dark secret.

It wasn’t until my late 20s, when I started doing some journalism work, that I decided it was necessary to ressurect my middle name. If you want to know about that, go here. Be prepared, though. It is Twilite Zone freaky.

I love my wife dearly, and am especially grateful when she poses for me, as in this picture:

Our fish are named Spotless and Lucky. Spotless originally was named Spot because he had a spot, but the spot went away. Lucky was won at a carnival.

Our dogs are named Kapu and Django. We’ve had Kapu since he was a puppy. The name comes from a book my daughter really liked when she was younger, Julie Of The Wolves. Django was named by me, after a famous jazz guitar player. The summer before last, Django just showed up at our front door. He’d been on the streets for a while, and was looking for a home. I invited him in, and he got along well with Kapu, and our 3 cats. We put up color posters all over the neighborhood, and at the local animal shelters but, eventually, he became one of the family.

My cat, Barney, had been suffering from some sort of kidney ailment for several years. Although we cared for him in the best way we could, he continued to waste away until he was just skin and bones. Up until the very end he enjoyed his life. When I saw that his health was finally failing, I put him to sleep.

My wife’s cat, Shogot-su (Japanese for New Year) got sick and died just a few days after Barney went. I think this was entirely unrelated, though. The loss was pretty tough.

Our remaining cat is a small tabby named Violet:

Barney (RIP):

Shogi (RIP):

Django:

Kapu:

And last, but not least, our goldfish. Spotless is on the right: